dealing with different views

[patrolman]

I have worked for three different types of PDs. I worked in the city then in a small town PD and now in well I guess you could call it a small city. I found that when I worked in the city I got this "Everyone is a scum bag" attitude and was always on edge even when I was not working. I then went to a small town and found it very relaxing, sure there was stress but I when I was not at work I found myself not thinking about work. Now I am kind of caught between the two. Sometimes I can go on my days off and not even think or remeber what happened to me through out my work week or sometimes I cant get certain things out of my head. Does this type of change of attitudes and sound normal?

[ATF SAC]

Perfectly. Manhattan isn't Mayberry and the OC is different altogether. Two factors to watch. The first is external, how much of the "stress" is a product of the department culture. I've been in squads where you could get high stress loads just sitting an reading reports. Whole place is wired and the cops are "stress junkies" feeding on negativity. Need to keep your distance from that - been periods where I just swore off listening to rumors. Peaceful ignorance. Been in big city shops where the cops keep it frosty and small departments where everybody was wired like the town was about to overrun by "the enemy". Certain amount of reality checking helps.

Second is internal. You have now been around the block a little. Your experience and confidence should be working for you. Still, nowhere is stress free in this job. Be careful about the advice to "leave it at the office." I think it is bogus advice. If it is with you off the job, it is not some failure to be mentally disciplined, you are stressed. You cannot control the things that happen to you but you can take control of how you respond to them. Don't try to look away from whatever it is, look right at it. You did fine in response or maybe there is something you want to focus on improving. That's ok, it is called learning. It is over and you know that with time you can move away from even terrible things. You like your work mostly, but are seasoned enough to know it is never perfect, nor are you. Got someone trusted to talk to, speak it out. You can literally get it outside yourself. Do something good for you or that you enjoy. If you lock up at somepoint and just can't get the issue packed and stored, find a counselor.

Practice some techniques to relieve the physical symptoms. Deep breaths, stretching. Focus mentally on something pleasant or good, get some perspective going.

Certainly, in this line of work, we rarely if ever go through it alone. Look around and you will see the signs that others are also bothered. Good evidence of normalicy.

Do some reading about stress. Learn and apply skills. If you are motivated, maybe get involved in some stress or CI counseling. Nobody learns it like someone who teaches it.