Im depressed

[Commando]

I have been a medic for 2 years now and ive had a call that i cant get out of my head. It was about 2 weeks ago and we were dispatched to a possible child not breathing, When we arrived we found the little one with no pulse and bruises all over his body, it was a 3 year old that was obviously beaten. We intubated the little one and were able to maintain heartbeat and resperations via bvm but they lost the little guy in the ER. I still have dreams of his little face in my head i can hardly sleep at night.
This one screwed me up for some reason because im supposed to be the tough medic and be able to deal with everything. I dont know maybe its because im a dad that this one has screwed with me. Anyway im going to sleep and try not to dream.

[MrJim911]

Did you attend a debriefing?

[KYEMT325]

Hey dude,

I had the same thing happen to me when I was a field EMT back in Kentucky about 6 years ago. 5 y/o child not breathing was the call, I lived less than a mile from the scene. Unfortunately the EMS crew at the station had some mechanical problems so it took them quite a while to get to the scene, leaving only me the first 10 minutes then one of my firefighter/EMT buddies showed up for the next 20. Sure enough, 5 y/o was no chance for him (had been gone a while but due to the family we decided to go the extra step.

Even now, 6 years later, I see this child's limp body in a dream or something. I was very depressed for a couple of days, then things got better after I was given information that the child had a terminal disease and the family didn't want to tell us because they were afraid we wouldn't take those extra measures to try to save him.

I talked to our department chaplain and my family and friends and it helped me to let go of it and move on.

I wish you luck and hope that your dreams will be only of the good things you've done and the people you've saved.

Peace

[diverescuer]

Commando,

I found that going over the call with someone else who was there is helpful. And also, to concentrate on the good that you have accomplished over your time in EMS.

A few weeks ago I worked a car accident with 4 vehicles. Upon arrival, one code black and one trauma red were pinned in seperate vehicles.

I participated in the extrication for the red, a young girl who looked almost exactly like my fiancee. We are a great extrication team but this accident was so bad it took almost twice the usual time to get her out. She was eventually airlifted to a level 1 hospital. She survived with many, many broken bones and internal injuries.

I then led the extrication on the fatality. Once again, the male who was pinned looked almost exactly like me. It freaked me a little, but I just did the job. For some reason, I felt the responsibility to be the one to bag him up for the coroner.

The more I thought about the call, I got depressed. The boy was just my age, and was racing a friend, and died. He simply made a mistake in choice. I have done the same thing in my past, but for some reason I didn't die.

Over time I found that concentrating on the girl, and tracking her progress has helped me. She was just driving home and not racing.

No one could have saved the boy you worked commando, but I'm sure you've made a positive impact on other people's lives. Think about those you've helped. Where would they be without you?

dive rescuer