go to SF or get out?

[lrsranger]

This question is for anyone with some info on SF. My question is I have 2 years left on my second enlistment and I am debating going to SFAS and staying in for alittle more to try that. This desision would be hard for me and my wife we would be seperated for a year or maybe more because of her school. The plan for us has been for me to get out and go into le were ever she goes to school. I am afraid I will regret not going my whole life if I dont try it. So any one with some info on this would be greatly appreciated.Has any one had a similar problem.

[k9cop21811]

I was in a similar situation before I got out of the military. Shortly before getting out I was offered a very prestigious intell. school that would have kept me out of a uniform the rest of my career (I worked counterintelligence). The catch was I had to re-enlist. I debated it very heavily, but in the end knew that LE was what I really wanted and as much as I enjoyed my seven years in the Army, I have never regreted it.

There are some things that I wish I had done while I was active duty (i.e. gone to Airborne School--Air Assault was good, but not at all the same). But in my line of work it wasn't really necessary, although I could have gone anyway. I guess my point with that little story is; you're going to have some regrets. In a majority of the cases, you just can't do it all. Only you and your wife can decide this one though. Best of luck to you.

[MacLeod]

Well these are those infamous choices in life that haunt us forever. I agree with K9 about you can't do it all. And that's important to remember. You'll always meet someone that has done more and got a better job than you, and likewise, he'll meet someone else that'll humble him as well. The trick is being happy with what you have, and challenging yourself to the point that you aren't bored, but fulfilled. From my shoes, it's a decision for you and the wife. Be honest with her and yourself. IF you want it, and you are backsliding on a previous committment, then tell her, but be prepared to pay full fare. Likewise, she should understand that SFAS wasn't an option when you made the deal.

I think I would start with some absolutes:

You need to finish school if you haven't already.

You wife needs to finish school.

What do you want to do with your career, ultimately? Army or LE?

If you say Army, then go to SFAS, but have a plan for school.

If you say LE, let the enlistment run out, don't look back, get yourself and wife through school and kick ass on the street.

Either way, make the decision yourself. Don't be one of these guys that passed up something for a chick, only to have the relationship fail, and then blame them for keeping you from fulfilling your dream. That's horseshit. If you let PIE dictate your life, then you are destined to fail in a relationship and everything else in life. If you pass up someting for your wife, do it because you want to, and because you gave your word, LIKE A MAN.

I wish you luck, I say you've already accomplished a lot, a have plenty to be proud of for just being selected to attend SFAS.

[JHP]

lrsranger, you posted

I am afraid I will regret not going my whole life if I dont try

Well, do not become one of those " I wish I had done this, I wish I had done that" type of individuals about your career and then blame your spouse for your lack of fulfillment in life. If that is what you want go for it.

Good Luck in your Decision!

:bounce: JHP

[LeCarre]

Is there a National Guard SF unit in your area? You could get out, join the National Guard, get attached to the SF unit, try-out, and then go to SFAS, Q Course, etc., through them. You'd still go away for 26-52 weeks of training, but you could wait until your wife is done with school. Even if there's not a unit within driving distance, there are a lot of people who fly to drills just to be members of a NG SF unit. And as for age, don't worry. I had lunch with a guy yesterday who just got back from SFAS at the age of 37. Your timing would be good.

See my post above about the SF opening up recruitment.

[CA_ARNG_LT]

This discussion is for you and your wife. She holds the answer. Do you have children? Is your marriage more important than your career? Is your wife strong and will she support you through all that SF will bring? If your wife can do it, go for it. If she cant decide whats more important her or SF (which you havent even made it through yet). I say marriage is more important but thats me. I view my contract with my wife and god as important as my military obligations. Have a very long talk with your wife to figure this out. Talk to an SF married soldier. You have two or so years to decide. Research this, you owe it to yourself and family.

[MacLeod]

Just wanted to give an AMEN to brother CA!! Say what you want, but if you wanted to be single you had your chance. SF is a single man's game. Even if you make it, plan to spend lots and lots of time away from home on deployments.

IF you have kids, you need to be close to them. LE is tough, but SF is harder on the family life. Thank GOD there are enough guys out there willing to do it. I'm not. I'd rather be dead than not see my wife and kids each day.

[lrsranger]

Thanks for the replys. We are still talking about it but it looks like I am going to go in FEB. I have a very strong wife who I would never blame for not going. also I have friends who used to be in and have been talking to them I hear just like every thing good and bad. As far as making it im not to worried as long as no injuries. And for LE I am still young 24 so I have plenty of time to spend doing this and than go to LE and I will have more to bring to the table when I switch over to LE.

Freedom is the sure possession of those alone who have the courage to defend it.

[DJOHNSON954]

Tough decision here. If you make it through all phases of SF you will have spent alot of time away from your family. After making it through all the phases, much more time will be spent away from your family on deployments. If you have a strong wife that supports your ambitions then half of the battle is won. If it's truely what you want then you must go for it. As for me SF was never a desire but I had friends that went that route.

Le will still be there when you get out. I know a guy who retired SF and is working for Fayetteville PD now. It boils down to what's in your heart. Good luck in oyur decision.

P.S
Going SFAS in Feb. is a good idea vs. going in the summer months. The NC heat is a killer! Get your feet ready now!

[sred102]

I am going to make this short and sweet. IF it is what you really want. Do you think about it more daily than you do your wife or anythng else ? IF you do and you dont go . IT WILL TEAR YOU APART . IF you go and dont make it Ok ....But you tried to fill a dream. I got out of the army with out SF qualifier , Went a couple of years and it drove me nuts. I reenlisted and did it . I will die happy .....:p