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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    chesapeake va
    Posts
    32

    trying to be a cop is not easy part 2

    Greetings to all,

    I come to you all as I did before, because I really dont know where to go now.

    for those who read my previous post, I went through some extreme changes in my from the moment I made the conscious decision to be a cop. well persistance did pay off and i did get accepted into a academy.

    there were 21 of us in the beginning, one guy ended up quiting later for his own reasons. I went into this not believing that finally this part of my life would finally be over and a new chapter would begin. Then the problems started to happen,

    I got a speeding ticket that i had to go to court for, they werent happy with that but it ended up being dismissed. two weeks later the old vest that they gave me i lost. I wasnt issued that vest, they were old vest pieces that the DT instructor gave to us to wear if you didnt want to wear your own if you had one. they wrote that up and let it go.

    Months go by we're on week 20 of 24, only thing left to take to graduate was the state test on the week before last. just taking one of our weekly test and i get one wrong, given the test on wednesday and i missed the same one again, rule is the academic instructor goes over the lesson plan, the question and the answer are verbally given and thats it. She wasnt there that day so one of the general instructor called me in an asked me that question. I gave him two answers, the right and wrong one, and i articulated my reasoning for both answers. He takes it upstairs, comes back down says that you cant have both answers pick one. I do, ends up being the wrong one but i didnt know that until the next day when the Sergeant came down and talked to me before we were let go for the day. He said that they were deciding whether to keep me or not and that I would find out something on monday.

    normal monday as always, going through the first class when the instructor comes in and has me pack my gear from the classroom and takes me to see the Captain. They let me go, the Sergeant walks with me as I go to pack up my locker. wouldnt let me say goodbye to my classmates.

    Figured I get back on the horse with another PD go through the board and never get a answer back. six months later i get the same from a sheriffs office. In the meantime, trying to find stable work, girlfriend broke up with me, finances getting worse, had to move back in with my parents has me busy.

    my best friend calls me from cali he's a cop out there, gave him the updates and again he tells me to pack my stuff and move out there with him, has a job lined up for me and then i can start applying out there, talked with a buddy from the academy recently and he saying that i would still be taking my issues with me and basically i would be in the same situation out there but he did say to put in for the pd that let me go again. ( this has been almost two years now).

    I finally got stable work now working for a private company and im getting my finances back in order but now im at the point of do i keep going for this or not. im 26, im looking at least a year or two to get stable again, i go into these phases of just not wanting to talk to anybody at all because i think no one can help me which eveybody understands execpt for this girl that im dating and i think because of me pushing her away and not calling her is making her not want to be around me when i do break out of that phase.

    so any advise at all anybody?

    long winded i know

    thanks for listening,

    viper
    After bringing in an 70 year old combative woman into booking my firearms instructor has this conversation with his chief:

    Chief: did you learn your lesson?

    Him: (after rubbing the area where she decked him) yes i did

    Chief: then life is good (and walks off)

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    345

    Ok brother man..........

    I'm gonna give this one a shot. After reading your post initially, my knee jerk reaction was, "Does this guy really need to be a cop. The thought process being this. You're having these hiccups in the academy that are causing you some problems and ultimately cause your dismissal. Was your head really in the game? I mean we all make mistakes, and life is always gonna throw you a curve, but did you really want to be there to begin with? The underlying tone and tenor of your post kinda made me think you were questioning whether you wanted to be there. Could be off base, and if so disregard. But if I'm not, and you were questioning your career choice at the time, it could be your subconscious and/or God's way of telling you to move on. I've always been a firm believer in the fact that God's gonna put ya where he wants ya. As Bill Engvall would say, "Here's your sign........"

    Policing just isn't for some, and if your questioning whether or not it's for you, my advice is to move on. I'd hate to see something like career indecision cost you your life or the life of another. If you're sitting on the other end of these one's and zero's gnashing your teeth together in defiance as you read this, then by all means get back on the applicant trail. If your personal life is in disarray, you're gonna want to square that away first obviously. Personally and financially. I'm sure I'm not telling you anything you don't already know. Everyone deals with stress and strife a little differently. Some, such as yourself, push people away. Significant others (in particular) tend not to understand this. Police work will only add to the stress in your life. If you intend for this to be a career, (and you want to stay with the woman you're with) you need to develop a better mechanism for dealing with the stressors in your life. If you don't, failed relationships and/or marriage are likely to be in your immediate future. I speak from personal experience on that one.

    All that having been said, I think you really need to stop and ask yourself if this is the career you want. Personally, law enforcement chose me, I didn't choose it. It just kinda happened. I never questioned it though because the work suited me and I loved getting up for work everyday. I mean when I first started, I was ready to go an hour or more before I was scheduled to be on shift. Literally. I was chomping at the bit to hit the street. (That fades with the passage of time BTW...... ) Be honest with yourself, be honest with those you care for, and ask the same of them. Weigh it all out, and then make the best decision you can based upon the facts at hand. Thats all any of us can do when you break it down. I wish you the best of luck.

    Scout
    Last edited by Scout1811; 04-08-2007 at 08:44.
    Never take life to seriously................no one gets out alive anyway. -- Author unknown

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    chesapeake va
    Posts
    32
    when i read the first sentence of your post, my heart skipped several beats.

    after that i said that i thank you for being brutally honest with me. i didnt realize how i wrote it that it sounded like i was being indecisive. By no means is that the case, from the first post on here ( its the same title as this one) i have dedicated my life for this, its has been a uphill battle. the 19 people i went through the academy with could tell you of my commitment to them and the job.

    I wish I was that fortunate, but I know that just like you and everybody else on here that this job isnt for everbody and that it takes a special kind of person to do this job.

    I know what I have to do in order to get back, its just that its been a long road and if its my destiny it will happen

    Im just trying to be the miracle not just wait for it to happen.

    thanks again,

    viper
    After bringing in an 70 year old combative woman into booking my firearms instructor has this conversation with his chief:

    Chief: did you learn your lesson?

    Him: (after rubbing the area where she decked him) yes i did

    Chief: then life is good (and walks off)

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    345
    Quote Originally Posted by viper24 View Post
    this job isnt for everbody and that it takes a special kind of person to do this job.
    Oh there are some special people here all right. I mean have you really read some of these posts. Take Big Sexy for example.............dood talks in the 3rd person. I wonder if he sings in the 3rd person in the shower?? And the mods, don't get me started...............

    (Ok, in truth, I just happened to be reading a thread Big posted, and the mods..........well they are always fair game)

    All kidding aside, if you are firm in your career choice, then don't hesitate. Talk to those close to you, set yourself up for another charge, and then get back at it. It took many of us years to get where we wanted to be. Perseverance and determination will pay off. There will be more bumps in the road, but you can take something positive away from every experience. Best of luck, and keep us posted on your progress.
    Last edited by Scout1811; 04-09-2007 at 08:09.
    Never take life to seriously................no one gets out alive anyway. -- Author unknown

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    Washington, DC
    Posts
    559
    I don't think there is anything anyone could say on here that is really going to help you. You got hired by a police department. Good job, they picked you for a reason, because they thought you would make a good cop.

    You got a speeding ticket, it happens.

    You lost a vest. I think everyone has lost something.

    You failed a test, blame whoever you want, 19 other people passed the test. Does it mean you shouldn't be a cop, or you are dumb, no it means you failed the test.

    When they look at the problems they had with you, the ticket, the vest and the test, they probably said, you know what... this guy is just going to be a pain in the ass to us if we let him on the streets.

    It may not be any one thing you did, it may be the combination of all three.

    So you took it all to heart and let it bother you. Well it should bother you to a degree. But law enforcement is full of stress. You need to be able to handle that. You need to be able to work 12 hour shifts everyday of the week and have no time for your family at points. You need to be able to see dead children and bad auto accidents and deal with it all somehow.

    Everyone deals with it differant. Perhaps if you had that much stress during just the academy then the streets are not for you.

    Does that mean you should never be in law enforcement? No

    It means you should ask yourself who you are and why you want the job. Can you handle the added stress of the real life events.

    If you apply somewhere else they are going to wonder why you failed out of the last academy. If it were up to me and I had a applicant who failed once before and a guy who has never been, I would pick the other guy. Why take the chance, I would assume you were let go for a reason.

    The plus side...
    Everyone seems to need cops right now. Everyone, apply all over, I am sure you will get hired by someone else. Try big cities, they may be willing to overlook your issues. But before you go, get your finaices in order and your personal life. Try to start fresh and devout yourself to it. Don't speed around and keep track of your stuff.

    Maybe you can take what happen the first time and use that to help you get through the next academy. Things happen for a reason. If you are not meant to be a cop, maybe you are not meant to be a cop. Leave it at that. It does not make you any less of a person. I am not meant to be a doctor, lawyer, or about a million other things.
    God Created Cops So Firefighters Could Have Heros!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    confidential
    Posts
    152
    Post deleted by moderator because it's 6 months old - read the rules of the board.
    Last edited by krellum; 11-02-2007 at 17:34.


 

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